The REAL List.



On the third day in the six month of 2007 our friend Eugene created a list. A top ten guitarists list. This list received heavy criticism from our friends and was widely considered a steamy pile of shit. While his list was very well detailed it failed to mention a few of the big names in the big game of guitaring. I am putting the argument to rest right now with the best 10 guitarists the world has even seen.

10) Angus Young (ACDC)


9) Eric Clapton


8) Kurt Cobain (Nirvana)


7) Jimmy Page (Led Zepplin)


6) Keith Richards (Rolling Stones)


5) Tom Morello (Rage Against the Machine)


4) Kirk Hammet (Metallica)


3) Slash (Guns 'N' Roses & Velvet Revolver)


2) Jimi Hendrix


1) Mr. Cummings




Finally the mater debating will end..

"'Bout To Get STUCK!!!"


--I'll jump right into it, last night was the best boxing match I have ever seen. Mayweather vs Hatton didn't only live up to the hype, but exceeded it. There was rarely a dull spot during the fight and it didn't even go to decision as Mayweather knocked him out in the 10th. This was the best fight I have ever seen for several reasons. A) Wayne Newton. B) Mayweather came out to the Boss' "Born in the USA." C) Not only did he come out to that, but with Mark Cuban and Wayne Newton carrying his belts. D) WAYNE FUCKING NEWTON!! E) The English fans spontaneously breaking out into song. F) Sir Charles Barkely. G) 10th Round TKO H) Hatton taunting Mayweather mid-round. I) Last but not least, the opposite reaction from the girls sitting ringside as Hatton hit the mat for the second time. The one on the left was going crazy as the one on the right began to cry. Hilarious. I don't know dick about boxing, but Mayweather is probably the best I have ever seen. He's not as dominant as Tyson was, or as consistent as Lennox Lewis, but he is so good at what he does. Lots of people don't like watching him because he's such a defensive fighter, but if you were that fast you would be too. He's so good he doesn't even need to put his hands up to block punches because he just knows nobody's fast enough to hit him. I hope he keeps fighting because he really is spectacular.


--Tebow took it home! Thank god. If the voters found a way to not give it would have been absurd. He was head and shoulders above everyone else this season despite him playing in the SEC. Speaking of which, which is better? The AFC West or the SEC? Pretty close right? Anyways, Tebow became the first sophomore to ever win the Heisman and is the front-runner going into next season. The only question is who is going to be able to take it away from him? You know his numbers are going to be outstanding again with that high powered offense and all of its returning stars. If he stays healthy he will probably put up as good as numbers next year as he did this year, maybe better as he evolves into a more passing oriented quarterback. Regardless, let's say he goes for 30 TD in the air and only 15 on the ground. Pretty reasonable numbers. Who in the country is going to be able to top that? And above that, Florida is going to be one of the best teams in the country next season and one of Tebow's biggest problems this year was that he played for a three loss team and that shouldn't be a worry next season. Can we give it to him now?


--Florida over Michigan by thirty on New Years


--If the Red Sox get Santana...That will really suck





--Did I mention Wayne Fucking Newton?

Mad Jelly


Has anything even been so amazing whilst also being ridiculously pathetic?