Fight Night

For most of you, this entry won't make very much sense. In order to fully grasp this entry you have to have seen Rocky I, II, III, and IV, or at least have a clue who the boxers featured in the films are. On top of that you might need to know who some real boxers were, or basically just Tyson, to really understand what I'm getting at.

Throughout the Rocky series, a number of juggernaut boxers are introduced. Amongst them are Ivan Drago, Clubber Lang, Apollo Creed, and of course, Rocky Balboa. All of these fighters have very different and unique fighting styles, and aside from Drago are physically a lot alike. But as Rocky triumphs over all of them the questions arose, what if these fights happened in real life? Would Clubber Lang really lose to Rocky in the re-match? Would Rocky knock out Drago in Russia during the Cold War? Could Drago have killed Apollo in the first round? So many questions came up. Then I strarted thinking about, what if real boxers fought these fictional, yet dominate characters. Although it was before my time, "Iron" Mike Tyson in his prime was a stone cold killer. He knocked out everybody he fought. So how would he stack up against Balboa or Clubber? After much deliberation I think I needed to make a list. A list with each major boxer on it, fictional, or real. Here's my list starting with the best.

1)Ivan Drago
Ivan Drago stood out to me as number one for several reasons. First off was his size. Drago was a mountain of a man and injected steroids very regularly. He packed so much pressure with each punch that he could kill somebody. Which was never more evident than midway through Rocky IV when Apollo Creed and Ivan Drago squared off in an exhibition bought. Drago dominated the first round despite fighting in America where Russians at the time were hated by everyone. Rocky disputed whether or not he should throw in the towel for Apollo, but when he made his decision he was too late. Before Rocky had the chance to save his friend, Drago had punched him so hard that he killed him. Granted Apollo was getting old, and Drago was a steroid abusing monster, but he still killed a man. A man that was once the best fictional boxer in the world. If the fight Rocky vs Drago were a real one, not only would Drago have won, but he would have ended Rocky's life as well.

2)Mike Tyson
"Iron" Mike Tyson was the dominant force of boxing for a long time. It seemed everytime he stepped into the ring he knocked his opponent out. Tyson also had a shaky personality and personal life making him even more itimidating to his opponents. Tyson earned his place in history after he took a chomp at Evander Holyfield's ear during a fight in 1997. Compared to the "Rocky" boxers, Tyson most closely resembled Clubber Lang, but was tougher, crazier, and stronger. Also upon being a maniac in the ring, he also supported people with endless laughs in a post conference seen here...

Mike Tyson praises "allah," makes up words, tells Lennox Lewis he's going to eat his children, confesses he only trained for two weeks, and more all in one video. Even with just two weeks of training he still knocked out his opponent in thirty-eight seconds. This is why he is number two, but a close second at that.

3)Clubber Lang
Mr T started started his illustrious, yet debatedly unsuccessful career in Rocky III. He played the madman Clubber Lang. Clubber introduces himself during the Rocky statue presentation. He tells Rocky that he's washed up, a bum, and then proceeds to spit some game to Adrian. This pisses the "Italian Stallion" off as Rocky challenges him to a fight. Biggest mistake Rocky ever made. Clubber knocks him out early in the fight and takes the title from Philly's golden boy. It was the first time Rocky had lost a fight since his original bout against Apollo in Rocky I. Somehow Rocky wins the rematch and the end of the movie, but this is just another protagonist over antagonist ending. Bullshit. If the movie was called Clubber III then Mr T. would've eaten Rocky's children.

4)Rocky Balboa
The "Italian Stallion" is probably the world's most famous fictional boxer. Hell he even has a real statue outside of the Philadelphia Art Museum. He is without a doubt one of the most historic fighters in history, real or fake, but that doesn't neccesarily make him the best. Clubber Beat him, and Tyson in his prime would've given Drago a run for his money. In a real fight, Drago would not lose to Rocky, he would anailate him. He would probably give him a brain hemorrhage then made love to Adrian while his son watched and applauded. Rocky was still a champion for a long period of time, which makes him Matt's fourth best boxer of all time.

5)Apollo Creed
Once the most feared fighter in the fictional boxing world, Apollo Creed had fame and fortune. When Rocky defeated him the second time around, in by far the most unrealistic of unrealistic fights in the rocky movies. This was the start of the end for Apollo. He became friends with Rocky, and even helped him train for the rematch against Clubber. Unfortunately, Apollo didn't want to get old, didn't want to become a trainer, and wanted to prove to the world he was still a dominant force in the boxing world. He wanted a piece of Drago and that would be the last bad decision he would make, because early in the second round, the massive Russian ended the life of this historic African American fighter.